Last night was opening night and all things went better than expected. Our little glitch in the actors for the produciton was taken care of and all flowed perfectly. These kids are incredibly resilient. I was forced to do the one thing I have always hated. I HATE to give curtain speeches. I trully feel I feel that I have NO PLACE in the production once final dress rehearsal is done. If I haven’t done my job by then, then it is never to be done. I do not understand directors who want to hover backstage, lead warm-ups, give last minute tips. My thinking is that once final dress rehearsal is over, a director is nothing more than a patron who will likely get the best seat in the audience for the opening.
But after the opening . . . That is when I don’t even WANT to sit in the audience. No matter how bad/good the show is – I simply can’t sit there and watch it play out over and over again. The young actors DO NEED a long run. (We have 7 shows – which is a rather long run for high school.) BUT the director does NOT need a long run. When I do productions in our large proscenium house I can sneek into the furtherest corners of the audience and hide there during the show. And often (don’t tell the cast) I do step outside to get some air and to stop hearing the words in my head.
But when it comes to a Blackbox show there is no place to hide. Once the doors are closed there you are! Now I must sit in full view of everyone – and watch the show. My biggest fear is that I will start acting out every work and every movement in my seated body. I worry that my expressions will be bigger than any of the actors on stage.
At the end of the night, my face, my jaw and even my chin are sore. I believe they have been acting every moment during the show. My face has likely been more expressive then the entire cast put together. God, I hope that no one was looking at me while I was looking at the show. God help me.
One comment on “My Chin Might Become an Actor”
Haha, I doubt most were looking at you, but I can see why you’d be a little nervous at the thought of it if that’s what’s going through your mind as you watch your students.
You are so clearly involved in your work. I’m sure you can’t help but have those feelings as you watch the performances.
But even if people are watching you, it doesn’t matter. You’re completely immersed in your craft. If that shows on your face, it’s better than looking bored.
I’ve seen a lot of bored teachers in my time. That’s painful. But one who seems to care, that’s comforting.